Its not some half cocked new year's resolution. I was thinkin this before I even met Neil, he was just kind of a last attempt before temporarily throwing in the towel. I'm not 'giving up' on dating, I'm just determined to STOP giving up on ME. 2011 IS the year I'll finally get my shit together come hell or high water. Anyone that wants to have a hand in it by all means, but with or without anyone's help I WILL get my feet planted firmly on the ground.
All of the things I want to do for myself, I have learned I can't do with a man in my life. There's not a man out there who's secure enough to let a woman find herself without trying to keep her from succeeding in some underhanded back stabbing sabotaging way. I'm ok with that.
My last bag of christmas candy is almost gone, a bag of coconut tips. I don't have the heart to throw them out lol, they were mine and Granny's favorite together, but its a small bag so its ok. Once these are gone my healthy lifestyle is back in full swing. Tomorrow morning, around 7am sharp... yoga happens. I know I tried and failed so many times, but I only really fail if I stop trying right? So... even if I fail... I'm trying again. I take that back, failure is not an option this time around. Well, its always a possibility I suppose, but I'm not cool with considering it part of the plan. I should probably work on this whole mindless rambling in blogs thing too huh? Ah well, how else can I be me without being me?
A little part of me is hoping that I'll win some substantial sum of money. The logical part of me is planning to start AVON in the next month or two, then use THAT money to pay for either a car or cab fare (how much it looks like I'll be making will dictate that, so only time will tell) to get to a fulltime job somewhere else, then get a car and all that awesome jazz. I have a plan, I just hope I can make it happen. I KNOW its possible, just whether or not it pans out is the big question.
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